small beauties (006)
be realistic: expect good things.
One honourable point of all speech, all writing, all communication is to inspire people to be themselves. To look at themselves and love it and live in it, to live where they are. On paper, it sounds so simple. Because it is very simple, the idea. Very plain. The truth is simple like that.
But the execution of this point is the work of an entire lifetime. Partly because most of us get directly socialised out of being ourselves and when the messaging isn’t asking us to be something else, many of us aren’t taught how to see difference (in being, in intention, in expression) without prejudice or without feeling threatened by it or feeling pressured to identify with it, how to stand our ground/our own in peace and love when faced with other people’s realities. The socialisation of influence is just as strong as (if not stronger than) the socialisation of explicit teaching.
And partly because we keep changing. There is a new person to be every day. Every day you wake up is a day to find out who you are going to be that day, what opportunities the world will offer you to discover old or new parts of yourself, to be that, and if possible, to love that.
And I love this fact of life, I appreciate it. One job: live the life we’ve given you. How long will it take: Your whole life.
Some say the Thank you Jesus chaplet twenty times, lately I’ve had this playlist on repeat:
1. I know You have plans of good for me. I know it’s in Your nature as the supreme being to do that which I can not imagine. I accept these. I am realistic, I expect unimaginable good.
2. 'An angel will be with you shortly.'
3. Still, hardship, loss and disappointment are part of the game. I believe I will make it through as we are all life's longing for itself.
4. Thank You God for everything you have given me and everything that has happened to me, every single one of them- wonderful gifts. I know that this life you’ve given me is all I need.
From FACESOUL’s ‘Empowerment’:
With hardship comes ease
Literally with hardship comes ease
And I think we know our lives have been far from easy,
See, the journey we've gone on
The journey that we all go on, you can't put it into words
And what I've learned to realize is that all of us have undergone things in our lives that no one else will ever understand
And only our eyes have ever seen and only our hearts have felt that experience
As as result of it we can feel like we're alone on the journey
no sense of direction, just only us going
And in those moments it's hard to step forward and become somethin' better
But the reality of the situation is, in hardship, we’re not alone
Everybody undergoes challenges
Everybody's gonna undergo difficulties, the process of life
But when we realize that and we takes step forward
We can then attain a positivity and we can attain a beauty
That far precedes anything that we could have witnessed before
Fair enough our hardship we are all tied into
But the joy that we can attain can be unique for us all
And it's the realization that that can change the way that we live
Can change the way that we feel and the way that we experience life
And the thing is, we aren't just alone, we are life's longing for itself
So after us there will be life again
And the foundations that we put in place and the people that we choose to become
Our children inherit, you get me?
So I say it simply, proudly and truly, with hardship comes ease
And when we embrace that fact, the human spirit will always make it through
And in that, this is my prayer for you, this is my wish for you:
Have faith in the promise of life itself and you will continue and you will continue.
Just have faith you'll make it through
Y’kn’I mean, I love you, Y’kn’I mean.
Internet gems:
Love and cooperation create heavens.
Beauty is not a neutral thing, it’s actually calling you. (same O’Donohue On Being podcast episode I recommended weeks past)
This girl on her first day of kindergarten: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMrttHp2a/
Watching her reminded me of a conversation I had earlier this week where, at the end of tears, hugs and rubbed hands, I sighed “fear… fear is the enemy” and they looked up and said “fear protects us too. it is present where love is.” Pain demands an enemy, a never-again. Writing this is even a bit confusing for me because I believe in having enemies. I believe in love, a sun that leaves shadows. Is a never-again necessarily an enemy? Can I call fear an enemy, knowing and accepting and even loving that every day we go jam in front? I think I can. Isn’t fear simply love’s arch-nemesis, always lurking, always soliciting a quick game to prove itself? Your pastor will tell you that ‘Be not afraid’ is in the Bible 365 times, one for every day of the year because every day needs it. After all, the word ‘nemesis’ is derived from a Greek word that means ‘to give what is due’.
And at the same time, fear protects us too. It does, if we can find the message the came with. It helps us know the limits of our desire, for example. It just that it irritates me because, unlike love’s clarity, it usually needs me to do a lot of bush clearing. Shalaye is its Trojan horse. It’s always chatting. Lies inevitably. Let me stop here. No conclusion. No need for conclusion. Conversation is still going on.
Related: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMrttoddR/
Someone on TikTok shared the advice her high school teacher gave her at graduation: Lots of people will tell you to do big things just because you are capable but doing the right small things is not a bad way to go through life.
It struck me and I share this because no part of me is currently facing this sun and so I need to remember that life exists outside daunting dreams.
Actually, in fact perhaps, maybe the thing to do here is to remind myself that I am free to not be daunted by my dreams, free to not be so precious about whatever it is I feel called and equipped to do. Last week, I met a bookseller to ask about the market for magazines (since none of you, except Segun, scheduled a call with me on Calendly smh) and towards the conversation, he must have asked me “so, how are you feeling now about it all?”, because my response was “frightened/scared and excited and happy”.
He asked “why are you scared?” and when I started to say “because I haven’t done this before and and and,” he looked at me in a way I interpreted as please get over yourself and cut me off with a list of ways I had shown him preparedness in that conversation.
Sometimes look at the mountain, acknowledge its immensity, and change your own size. Claim a new size off the rack. The universe is in you as you’re in it.
Till next time,
Immaculata.
That On Being episode is the gift that keeps on giving!